Finding peace and purpose while healing from trauma is a journey, and for many, faith is a profoundly healing force along the way. In my own journey, my relationship with faith has evolved drastically over the years. Growing up, the churches I visited weren’t welcoming spaces—they felt distant, more about formality than connection. But as life unfolded, and especially after my mom passed, I found myself seeking God more genuinely, trying to make sense of the pain and find a foundation that felt strong enough to hold it.
A Conflicted Start: Church Hurt and Spiritual Mistrust
I first encountered faith in a meaningful way in my foster home, where Sunday school and youth group became part of my weekly rhythm. I began to learn about Jesus and what faith could mean. Unfortunately, the actions I saw around me didn’t always align with the words I heard. This experience of “church hurt”—seeing people preach about love and grace while acting in hurtful ways—was confusing and made me question religion as a whole.
To anyone who has also experienced “church hurt,” it’s important to remember that it isn’t God who caused that trauma but rather people who may not have truly lived by His teachings. The Pharisees in the Bible also claimed knowledge of God but missed the heart of His message. I had to learn to separate people from God’s nature, understanding that while people can disappoint, His love remains steadfast. It took time, but I realized that healing from spiritual wounds is not just about re-engaging with church—it’s about rediscovering who God truly is.
When Faith Feels Far Away
Healing through faith doesn’t mean you’ll always feel connected. I’ve had seasons where I felt spiritually dry, where my prayers felt like they hit the ceiling. These moments made me wonder if I was doing something wrong or if God had gone silent. But I’ve learned that God’s presence isn’t based on our feelings. Sometimes, silence is part of the refining process. During those dry spells, I clung to the promise in Deuteronomy 31:6—that He will never leave or forsake us. Even when I couldn’t feel Him, I chose to believe He was there. And eventually, I did feel Him again.
Finding God After Loss
The moment when faith became personal to me was after my mother’s passing. There was a depth of pain that nothing else could comfort, and I reached for a connection with God. Specific Bible verses have since become anchors for me, like Isaiah 43:2, which promises that we’re never alone in our struggles, and Philippians 4:13, a constant reminder that we’re strengthened through Christ. These verses have been there in my darkest moments, helping me feel held and protected.
One night, overwhelmed with grief, I broke down crying in my car. I turned on worship music and let the tears fall. It was messy. It was honest. And in that moment, I felt peace—not because the pain had disappeared, but because I knew I wasn’t carrying it alone.
Faith as a Framework for Forgiveness
Trauma often leaves us with deep wounds—some inflicted by others, and some we hold against ourselves. One of the hardest parts of healing has been forgiveness. But faith has taught me that forgiveness doesn’t mean excusing what happened. It means releasing it so it no longer controls me.
Through Scripture, I’ve come to understand that we’re called to forgive as we’ve been forgiven (Ephesians 4:32). That doesn’t mean it’s instant or easy. Some days, forgiveness looks like a prayer of surrender: “God, I don’t feel ready to forgive, but I’m willing to try.” That willingness opens the door to transformation.
Practical Ways I Connect with Faith
One of the most remarkable gifts faith has brought me is the power of worship and prayer as coping mechanisms. When emotionally drained, worship music helps me center myself and feel God’s presence. Prayer has become essential, primarily as I work to replace rumination with a habit of turning to God. On tough days, I write out my prayers in a journal, which has been a helpful way to stay focused when it’s hard to quiet my mind.
Here’s a simple Faith First-Aid Kit I use:
- A worship playlist that speaks to my soul
- Favorite Scriptures like Romans 8:28 and Psalm 34:18
- A breath prayer: “God, you are near. I am not alone.”
- A grounding verse written on a card I keep in my bag
- A go-to journaling prompt: “God, what are You teaching me through this?”
These small tools have brought me peace when my emotions felt overwhelming.
Faith and Identity: Becoming Who God Says You Are
Trauma lies to us. It tells us we are unworthy, broken, unlovable. But faith tells a different story. It says we are redeemed, chosen, and deeply loved.
Reclaiming my identity through faith has meant re-learning who I am. I started to speak truth over myself, not the labels trauma gave me. I would repeat verses like:
- “I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” (Psalm 139:14)
- “I am more than a conqueror.” (Romans 8:37)
- “I am a new creation.” (2 Corinthians 5:17)
This isn’t just feel-good talk. It’s rewiring your brain with the truth of God’s Word. It’s looking in the mirror and choosing to believe what God says, even when you don’t feel it.
The Science Behind Crying and Emotional Release
Healing from trauma often involves letting out emotions that have been bottled up, and for me, that’s sometimes through crying—letting it all out. Studies show that crying releases oxytocin and endorphins, which can ease physical and emotional pain. By fully expressing these emotions, we’re allowing our bodies to let go of built-up stress. It’s a profound, even sacred, act of release for which our bodies are wired.
This connects to Peter Levine’s work on somatic experiencing, where he emphasizes the need to physically release trauma, much like how animals shake off stress after a threat. In embracing practices like crying, shaking, dancing, or simply breathing deeply, we’re respecting the wisdom of our bodies and engaging in physical acts of healing.
Then vs. Now: My Faith Journey in Motion
Then: I saw God as distant. I carried my pain alone. I thought I had to be perfect to be loved.
Now: I see God as near. I bring Him my mess. I understand that He meets me with grace, not judgment. I still struggle, but I’m no longer doing it in isolation.
Inviting Faith into Everyday Life
In my healing journey, I’m learning that faith is something to live out daily, not just in prayer or worship. Though it’s not always easy, I’ve been trying to turn to God first for everything. On high-rumination days, I remind myself of verses like Romans 8:28, which assures me that all things work together for good, even when I can’t see how. This simple daily connection—sometimes through listening to worship music, prayer, or just being grateful—grounds me and reminds me of my true worth and purpose.
If you’re on a similar journey and perhaps struggling to connect with faith, remember that faith isn’t about perfection; it’s about intention and trust. It’s okay to have doubts, to feel distant, or to need a fresh start in your relationship with God. Try this simple prayer: “God, I trust You’re with me every moment. Help me see myself through Your eyes and guide me in letting go of the burdens that don’t serve me.”
Final Encouragement: You’re Not Alone in This
If you’re building or rebuilding your faith foundation, you’re not alone. Every step you take toward God matters. Healing doesn’t mean you won’t struggle—it means you have hope. It means that your story doesn’t end in pain but in redemption.
If you feel called, share a verse, a story, or a prayer. Let’s be there for each other, building faith and healing together.